August The First (or however you say it in Quaker)

Well....

Headed to New England Yearly Meeting. I have been getting regular updates as to the status of registration, etc on facebook - feels a little like we are all going to summer camp. Except that we are adults, and may still behave as such when we get there.

This is quite a day for me. Application was due for Doctoral program today - not sent, still not sure if the program is "right" for me, so now there's a dream deferred. Perhaps.

It is also the one-year anniversary of the first time I walked into a Quaker meeting. The day my whole spiritual life changed - and a year later I am headed to THE New England Quaker meeting. I am spending most of the week in Quaker worship, and of course trying still to figure out exactly what that is!

Yesterday I also spent some time at the Wampatuck School, a mix of heartache and nostalgia for a job that I know is no longer right for me or my family, but a school family that I will sorely miss.

Our commissioned work for Wind Band arrived (published copy) in the mail this week as well - the final chapter to a hugely magnificent project. What next?

What next indeed? For someone who does not deal with transition and change very well, I sure am pilin' it on this week!

The theme of this week is "jubilee" - a biblical time for rest and renewal, where one should just take what comes, rather than seek to create new experiences directly. A time of reaction, more than mere action. Ironically, we will also debate (I know Quakers don't "debate" - but I surely don't know what else to call all this) the issue of same-sex marriage that has divided so many meetings as of late. We will ask for guidance in creating new policies, supporting our members, doing what is right (once we figure out what that is).

I'm anticipating learning as much about the Quaker structures as the issues themselves. And it does make me nervous that I am headed for a large group of religious-types. In the past, I have thought that can truly only lead to trouble. Lots of "group think" and the like.

I have brought my own spiritual texts (and a worn copy of "Understanding the Bible" - just in case of more academic inquiry) and have committed to making space for thought, meditation, prayer, whatever necessary. I seem to be preoccupied with many "issues" for myself these days - I am hoping to gain a larger perspective that will help with all of them.

Bringing the computer, hopefully will blog of my take on this. Will be interesting to read for myself later.