"And now I began to have openings, leading to the ministry, and this brought on close exercise and deep travail of spirit. For although I had for some time spoken to business in monthly and preparative meetings, yet the prospect of opening my mouth in public meetings brought me a renewed and close trial. Yet, I endeavoured to keep my mind quiet and resigned to the heavenly call - if it should be made clear to me to be my duty.

Nevertheless, when soon after as I sitting in a meeting in much weightiness of spirit, a prospect opened and a secret, though clear, intimation attended to speak a few words that were then given to me to utter. Fear so prevailed that I did not yield to the motion, for which, I felt close rebuke and judgment seemed for some time to cover my mind.

But, as I humbled myself under his mighty hand, he again lifted up the light of his countenance upon me and enabled me to renew covenant with him, that if he would pass by this my offense, I would in future be faithful if he should again open the way therefor. And it was not long after when I was again moved to express a few words, which I yielded to in great fear and dread.

But O the joy and sweet consolation that my soul experienced as a reward for this act of faithfulness! And as I continued persevering in this duty and this watchfulness, I witnessed an increase in divine knowledge and an enlargement in my gift.

- "The Life, Exercises, and Experience of Elias Hicks"